Waltz by the river...

(c)Eni Turkeshi Photography

inspired by

i built so many ships when i had no sea to sail them

note all images :© Eni Turkeshi Photography

Get me away from here i`m dying

you`re my fire



you`re my air



you`re my earth



you`re my water

note all images: © Eni Turkeshi Photography

The moon landed in my window

all photos : © Eni Turkeshi Photography
none can be used without my explicit permission!

Silent Exclamation of Abandonment

 

There's something special about the abandoned places.Besides their looking so gloomy,lonely and sometimes scary , what mostly catches my attention is the spooky silence of them.

Or should I say , screaming silence?Because even if you can't hear this sound, your ears feel like echoing different voices, thousand sounds and so much melodies.
And it has the same effect on your eyes as well.There's a transparent visuality coming in sight there.It's maybe very weird , but your mind indispersed to so many alternatives.

This can't come out just because of our imagination.It can't be just mere fantasy.Or a wisdom caprice.
I think it's the unique blend of perception and the genuine force of memories and the melancholy for what has been truelife and now abandoned.

I shot this photo in Muriqan,Shkoder,very close to the political borderline between Albania and Montenegro.That's what I thought while taking this photo.

Honeymakin' ? / Mjalteberje ?

Endowed with the lust pollens,
Enclosed with elegant confines;
Love scents absorbed;
They pour the mellifluous passion !
------------------------------
Te pajisura me polenat e epshit,
te rrethuara me kufinj elegante,
Aromat e dashurise thithur ;
Ato derdhin pasionin e embel si mjalti!

p.s : kjo foto u pergatit me rastin e nje konkursi te titulluar "pjeset e trupit " ne grupin tim independentphotos ne flickr.per me shume detaje klikoni ne ikonen e grupit qe gjendet djathtas.perkthime dhe pershtatje te tjera jane shume te mirpritura:)

Can we give sorrow a shelter?

All of us have experienced sorrow, once or maybe often.

Reactions to sorrow have been different , though.

Some of us have just hated it , and have tried to escape from it in every possible way ,
whatever its price would be.

Some others, have understood it , never daring to be long time residents in its territories.

And some others have befriended it , learned from it , used it as a life motto, or as a trendy attitude .

Suddenly , the abandonment occurs.
Sorrow is banished from their lives, minds,hearts , and thoughts like a plague suffering dog.

According to Han Yu (chinese writer 768-824) : The seven consistents of emotional make up are: joy,anger,sorrow, love,fear,hatred & desire.A man of superior emotional make up will display these emotions in a balanced manner”

Joy is always wellcomed , looked forward ,valued as one of the best things we are blessed with.I do agree.I love joy and being joyful.I can’t say no to joy.I love to make people happy too.

So is love and desire, except for the socially pervert,unusual,uneasy definited ones.

Anger , Fear and Hatred are also accepted even though they might be hidden ,tried to be limited or suppressed .

But when it comes to sorrow , things change.
Sorrow is not wanted , at least when it looses its sedative desertion charms.

Right after , escape from sorrow begins.
A total sorrow detox takes place , boosted with fake happiness/innovation pills.

But will this heal us?

Wouldn’t it be better if we offered sorow a corner in our soul , share it with the other consistents of our emotions , perceive it , nurture it and approach to it ? Can we offer sorrow a shelter?

Maybe this would be more constructive and realistic., thus would lead us to stronger , non-deceitful self and to a witty life vision.

Below you may read some sorrow related quotes that I like:

1.But the sorrowing are nomads on a plain with few landmarks & no boundaries , sorrow horizons are vague and its demands are few.

Larry Mc.Murtry
american writer

2.It’s such a secret place the land of tears.

Antoine Saint de Exupery (1900-1944)
from the Little Prince

3.O sorrow wilt you live with me , no casual mistress , but a wife.

Alfred Tennyson
(1809-1892)

4.Yes, he thought-, between grief and nothing I will take grief.

William Faulkner
(1897-1962)
U.S novelist

5. I was the insider and the outsider.I was at home and I was exciled.I have never been happier , nor have I been sad.

Betty Bao Lord U.S writer

You've got mail :)

I love letters.I love sending and receiving letters.
I remember , during summer holidays in high school period , I used to send letters to my school friends.I also received a lot of letters.It was so much fun, to receive lots of letters a week.
We became friends with the postman and he'd say smiling when he came: Hey dude, you're lucky, this time I have 2 letters and a postcard waiting for you:)
It was fun, indeed!

And this was just 10 years ago.Not such a long time.But how much have we , our habits, our lives changed!!!
I admit it , I've become one of those lazy persons too.
Pity ; I know, but internet's limitless availability and the rush that characterizes our daily lives doesn't help at all to arouse the will of letter communication.

But all of us love to receive letters, I know.So , if we just push ourselves to do something different one day , to behave more humanly and less cyberly:), we could re-change some things.
I wanna take advantage of this self-critical post to thank my cousin and my Brasilian blogger friend
Luciano for the lovely postcards:)

P.S : I guess my 2008's sole resolution will be : sending letters and postcards to my friends:)

Simple,genuine &sincere

 

I got this lovely images from a village near Pogradec ; a city located at the east of Albania.We visited it last week with my albanian flickr friends.The part seen at the upper photo was very close to the hotel and I got the chance to catch this fabulous view at the afternoon when the sunlight caressed so softly the surroundings and where the sky,mountain and lake seemed to mix with each other so magically.
Of course not to mention the fresh air , that would intoxicate anyone directly..
Then I met this fine old lady at the field .She was grazing her cow and drawed close to us, smiling in such an amicable and warm way ,that I think would have melted every grain of ice in this world.
She approached to us inquisitively , looking timidly and asking us , where we came from and what were we doing.We told her about our group and why we were there.She seemed amused from us and generously & indefatigably posed for us.

You should have seen her guys.She was so very sweet and all the time she plaudited us and wished us the best.You should have seen her smiling eyes and her brilliant smile, exclaiming eventhough it was disguised under the black veil.It meant so much to me.I experienced unique moments of serenity and relief.And yes, I felt so happy too!




I thought , I should repeat this as much as I can.Even if I can't always face such special people , I promised myself to rip myself off from everything tending to be counterfeit & tawdry.This would be the best pill against everything that annoys me.

I'm learning not to feel blue!

Each end of a year and the unevitable start of a new one, makes me sometimes feel gloomy.I guess it's because I always try to do the best (because of my unfortunately being a perfectionist) and be sad when not seeing everything as I hoped to be.
But it's not just this , for sure.It's a strange feeling; that of the life that floats through and you just can't stop it.It's because of that , I don't feel much like celebrating on 31st of December.
And I should admit I feel somewhat relaxed right after years change.
But right afterwards , this strange feeling of sobriety, just starts again.Right at the end of the year I have a strange will to fix time for a while and handle everything that messes my mind about.This might sound funny, I know , but I just can't help it.
So I decided that this years resolution would be : NO RESOLUTIONS AT ALL!
I'll try to set my self free of all these psychological burdens.

We'll see if I'll manage:)

Am I living in a Rembrandt's painting?

Sometimes I really have the feeling, I'm living in a paiting...

Who knows if the moon's?

who knows if the moon's a baloon,
coming out of a keen city in the sky-
-filled with pretty people?
(and if you and i should get into it,
if they should take me and take you into their baloon,
why then we'd go up higher with all the pretty people
than houses and steeples and clouds:
go sailing away and away sailing into a keen city
which nobody's ever visited,
where always it's Spring)
and everyone's in love and flowers pick themselves

Courtesy of E.E.Cummings (1925)

BUJRUN:)

Don't lie to me!

Once ,during one of our safaris, I experienced something very interesting that led me to this post.
We were taking photos with friends at Cibali one of the old , suburbs of Istanbul, very well known for the old fashioned houses and the very untouched nostalgic neighbourhood atmosphere.
But this is not what I'm gonna talk about today..What catched my attention was this little boy, that you may see on the attached photo.
I had shot hundreds of children portraits that last hour and I was feeling a bit tired.
Then I see this guy approaching.He asked me to take his portrait too.
Damn , I was so very tired, I just needed some rest, so I rushed to say smiling:
- But , my dear I took your portrait too.
-No you didn't -, he said .-You took a lot of pictures but not mine-, said he with a stubborn voice.
I looked at his eyes and suddenly had an unexplainable feeling of shame.Felt so very bad, for how I've acted.This little guy, had disarmed me with his genuine naivite.
I forced my self to smile, for I didn't want him to understand what I was thinking.Got some shots of him, showed them to him, then he thanked me , I thanked back and he went away.

While watching him , run away happily and carelessly , I thought how hard , wrong and meaningless was lying to a child.They'd challenge everything with their genuine sense of perceiving!
This case was not an important one maybe, but I'll bear this one in mind for the future:)

Lilja 4-ever (Bitter but stunning!)

Lilja is a normal , easygoing teenager , living in the former Soviet Union.She's very happy to hear that her mother is living to US with her boyfriend.She longs to go anywhere away from where she lives , as she finds it dreadfully boring.She likes Britney Spears so she's so excited to going there.Alas , she's abruptly told, that it'd be better if she followed them later.She is left alone in a poor , gloomy apartment , with no money, but vague promises.She's soon told from their state's child protection institution , about her being abadoned from her family as an unwanted inheritor.This causes ferocious pain to Lilja , but she's not an easygoing teenager any longer.After several , dissapointed trials , she starts prostituting to survive. She's become bitterly realistic , trying deceitfully to manage everything as she was totally apathetic.The sole sunbeam in her gloomy life ,is Volodya , a teenager guy , newly rejected from his family.It's heartbreaking and yet astonishing to see how this two lonely , abandoned, disasapointed, two kindred spirits aspire about a new , different, happy life without any dependences to anything they hate or that they are forced to have to live with.
Lilja falls for Andrei ; a guy she meets at the club where she realises her meetings with unknown men.Andrei promises her a new life in Sweden.She follows him , trying to escape from her dark reality , sadly , unaware of the fatal suprises that her fate will be concocting..The harsh reality of this movie seems to slap up your nerves.
Yet, the director has realised a great work conveying the inner worlds of two desperate teenagers , magnificiently proofing us that the liberty and redemption , lies in our soul ;that escaping from all evils depends to us ,ignoring all of the banal,quotidian , unescapable truths of life.
It's for that reason , that this movie is so replenishing , at least according to me.
Winner of different awards and nominated in different film festivals , "Lilja 4-ever" is a very special film , that I'd highly recommend.
For more infos check:http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0300140/
Rated : 7.8 over 10 at imdb.com .My vote: 8

p.s: photo sources: www.imdb.com & www.outnow.ch

Protecting the child in me!

photo courtesy : Özgün Erdem

I do miss the childhood days.The days when our biggest aim was to win the game and the merriest moment to be selected as the winner .The days we were satisfied watching our cartoons,worried because our doll had catched a cold, sad because of an unimportant quarrel with our friend.The days we were the happiest person to have a new toy or a brand new dress.The school days were fun , holidays a miracle:)

I do miss my easygoing manners, my so-called preoccupations:), my cheerful jumping in front of my house, my excitement on my first swim, my curiosity on the new literature teacher (told to be a very beautiful actress by time), my emotions on my very first crush and I can't help my self from envying my childhood, this merry time of my life.

A sociolog used to say."Every past is beautiful in our eyes"...

I don't think like him..Why I like it is because it's so very special and pure.It's too beautiful to be true, but that's real!

If there's a thing I like in myself ;that's trying to protect the child in me!I've always done this.I've always escaped from the "severe & serious" manners and people behaving like that,I find them so annoying!

Maybe it's risky to act or feel like a child ..You become more sensitive and vulnerable , you can get hurt easily ,but hell ! , you can feel the joy of that unfettered feeling!And that pays !At least it does for me...

We must try to protect the child in us ..It will make us better, much better...

Human behaviour

I was reading my friend's Blete's last post about "tears " and I paid most of the attention at one of the post's sentence.
She writes to be standing in front of a mirror watching herself while crying and controlling her mimics to enhance the dramatizing effect.

I felt this part to be so terribly true.I have done this always without being conscious.I think people can't help theirselves to feel kinda acting even on their normal expressions of their behaviours.
Not just on happy moments ,even on your worst moments , we tend to add some acting ,some drama to our behaviours.I'm not saying we do it on purpose , on contrary , we don't even realise it.But it's like that.Maybe we do it to express better our feelings , who knows?Or because all of us have that hidden hero that blows suddenly on this cases.
What I can't understand is how can this happen when we're upset?Isn't this so strange?How can we think of acting at this time?
But trust me, we do it, at least I do!Maybe we do it to express better our pathos , who knows?One thing is for sure: This is a very naive kind of acting , as it's natural,so it bears not any intention for emotions corruption.
What do ya think about that?

Permbledhje Shqip: Miq ne kete post shkurtimisht flas per menyren sesi ne i shprehim ndjenjat tona.Ne çdo gjendje shpirterore qe te jemi , sidomos kryesisht kur jemi te trishtuar menyra sesi e shprehim kete ndaj te tjereve mendoj se permban diçka teatrale.Pra ne dashje pa dashje i shtojme nje gjest aktrimi sjelljeve tona , pa qene te ndergjegjshem.Nuk jam e sigurte sepse e bejme kete , por mbase e bejme per te theksuar apo shprehur me mire ndjesite tona.Po ju si mendoni?

P.S: I called this photo "Hallucination?"Think goes well with what I was trying to say:)
P.S:Fotos se mesiperme ja kam vene emrin "Haluçinacion?".Me duket se eshte fotoja e duhur per kete post:)